That's Not My Name

I'm drinking David's coffee. It's like tar. You really have no idea. It burns going down and I love it! We make the Cary Grant method coffee. You know pour the coffee grounds until you have way more coffee than you do water. If you haven't seen the movie Walk, Don't Run you've missed out. It's super cute!

I have to go to work in 30 minutes. I really don't want too. Blah.

I met a guy. He loves Jesus. He's got a job, a house, and and he's only 22 seems to have his head on straight. I want to get to know him better. We'll see what happens. Meg, you need to come for the concert. Seriously. Guys seem to be jumping out of the woodwork's down here.

I'm going to the shooting range this Sunday. Jonathan is taking me. I think I might take David with me. He doesn't know yet. But I feel like I need someone there so Jonathan won't be as prone to put his hands on me. He's never inappropriate, but always on the line. I also invited the guy who is going to take me hunting. Jonathan doesn't know that either. :) I don't know if he will like that fact. *evil grin*

I am so excited about Josh Bales coming to sing. You have no idea. Oh, I don't have a problem with little kids coming as long as they don't interrupt the concert. I feel like I should put that out there.

I love it when my profs know my name. I have three classes and all of my profs know my name. That just makes me feel special or something! ha! I know, it's crazy. But there are quite a few kids at that college and knowing that they know who I am makes me want to go to class. This weight training class is CRAZY!!! There are so many jocks, too many stuck-up guys in this class. But I'm enjoying the exercise. There are only three girls (not including me) in my French class. Do you know how amazing that is going to be? More one on one time with Madame Knight; less pressure to get things correct; more room to get to know my classmates. I'm going to like this. I'm sitting in the very back of my math class. And the guys that I'm sitting next to are insane! They like to talk. Hopefully I'll get something out of this class!

Cabinets are finished now I'm just trying to get everything back on a shelf and it be organized. I need to do this soon because the Bible study is at my house next week and the house needs to be somewhat clean! *smiles* I'm really excited about it being at my home. I love having people over.

I'm gonna run. I need to finish my coffee and brush my teeth. Have a great weekend. Be safe. Have fun. Comment on my blog! *laughs* I'm teasing, but also serious. It's depressing when I blog all the time and don't get a response. Ben, you can comment too you know!

Food to Kill

I have about 30 minutes before I head to work. College begins... today! Can you believe it? I'm starting my second (full) semester. This semester I'm taking French II, Comp II, Learning Support Math II, Intro to Psychology I, and Weight Training. It wasn't exactly the schedule I wanted, but I couldn't get in touch with ANYONE at MGC yesterday. Still haven't heard from my advisor. But oh well... I'm registered and happy.

I completed my hunters safety course yesterday. Very proud of that fact! There are a few things I feel I need to have in order to go hunting. Boots, a knife, camo clothing (pants, shirts, socks). Here are the boots and the knife I am considering:

http://www.cabelas.com/cabelas/en/templates/product/standard-item.jsp;jsessionid=WYGQN3OYBXKKRLAQBBISCNVMCAEFEIWE?_DARGS=/cabelas/en/common/catalog/item-link.jsp_A&_DAV=null-cat600752&id=0069913831204a&navCount=0&podId=0069913&parentId=cat600752&masterpathid=&navAction=push&catalogCode=XK&rid=&parentType=index&indexId=cat601233&cmCat=netcon&cm_ven=netcon&cm_cat=Google&cm_pla=women%20hunting%20boots&cm_ite=netcon&_requestid=32221

I like these boots because they are pull-ons and snake proof. I hate tying shoes and boots would only be worse because they are so high! And while I'm not afraid to kill or gut a snake I don't want one to bite me.

The knife:

http://www.huntingblades.com/diwigutho.html

I like this knife because it's a fixed blade. So it's stronger than a folding blade. Plus, it's made for gutting and I do plan on field dressing/gutting whatever I kill. I am so excited.

Jonathan said he would take me hog hunting. The idea scares and thrills me all at the same time. Can I just say I love the thought of killing my own food and providing for my family that way?
I need to get my license though... I've thought about getting a license to go alligator hunting... but that might be a bit much for my first hunting season. :) We'll see what happens. I like alligator so maybe...

Clothing. Yes, I am going to wear camo. But I've been thinking, I don't want to look like a bum so I want my pants, shirt, jacket to be flattering. I'm going to have to research this.

There are some great deals at Kroger this week. You guys should check them out. Plus, if you've been collecting coupons you should be able to save even more with your coupons! I am going grocery shopping after I get off work Friday... I plan to save, save save!

I've already shared this with Meg but it just looks so amazing I can't help but share it with you guys too. I want this cookbook!
http://www.amazon.com/Abel-Cole-Cookbook-Keith/dp/0007277946/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1250620276&sr=8-4
If the cover and title alone don't inspire you to cook I don't know what will!

I'm gonna run. I hope you guys have a great week! Bonjour!

Practice Makes Perfect

I love the way a gun feels against my shoulder.

Rambo, Painting and Huntin'

Wow. I haven't blogged in forever. I didn't even realize it had been so long until Bethany told me that Ben had told her I hadn't blogged and it bothered him not knowing what is going on in my life. Goodness, between Bsquared I won't be able to get away from anything.

I have pictures of the snake while I was cooking it and will put them up soon. It was actually really good. No, Rambo (that's what we named the snake) did not taste like chicken. He was really moist and tender (after getting around the bones) and sweet. I don't know if that was from soaking him in Don's all night or what. But I think snake is one of my favorite meats as far as taste goes. Next time I will completely de-bone him though. Now that I know what I'm doing it shouldn't take me as long as it did.

I am working on getting my hunters safety course completed and then I am going to buy a hunting license. I even have a guy to take me. No, it's not Jonathan so don't worry. But I haven't actually met him... I work with his Mom and have talked with him over the phone. I'm not crushing on him or anything but he called me "darlin'" and I am a sucker for a that word. I don't know what it is but that word makes something inside this girl melt. Anyhow, I need to hang out with him sometime and get to know him that way I'm not going into the woods with a complete stranger... and so Dad's okay with it. Hunting season starts October 17th. That gives me plenty of time to get to know him, get my license, and practice shooting. I need to know how to aim. :)

I also need to finish these cabinets. I'm almost done; I have one more that needs to be completely painted and then a corner that needs a second coat. Then I'll need to give the trim two coats. Man, I am ready to be done! They look nice though. And I can't wait to get the doors and new hardware up. It's going to look amazing.

Last night was one of the most interesting nights of my life. I met up with some friends at Starbucks and then we walked around the neighborhood behind Starbucks (talking about Rambo! haha! Candace didn't know I had gutted it and I am so proud of myself I just had to tell her) only to end the evening standing/sitting by the Comfort Inn talking about our most embarrassing moments, fashion trends, etc. It was hard to tell what everyone was thinking/feeling. Expressions weren't freely coming and it was just awkward for me. I didn't know what to say, or do, or even think at times. I feel like Candace and Greg were the only ones truly comfortable. Although, I could be wrong about RG... I've been around him in various settings and haven't yet seen him uncomfortable. Poor kid, he looked dead tired. People don't even think about the fact that he gets up way too early in the morning. That's why I like to ask him because I know he gets up around 5am this time of the year. It makes people feel bad. Ha! That shouldn't make me laugh but it does. It was a good night. I like hanging out with Candace and RG so that was fun... I guess.
RG was feeling really feisty or something last night. He "whatever-ed" me last night first thing and then told me he would give me the "hand" too. Must have been the Thai food they ate and it must have only been his meal because no one else was acting that way.
I think I'm going to ask him over for supper next week. It's been a while since he's had dinner with the family. I have next Thursday evening off so I'll probably do it then. What do you guys think I should cook? Chicken enchilada casserole sounds really good right now.

Josh Bales concert: October 8th, 7:30 or 8pm. You can email this address: bookjoshbales@gmail.com to let them know you are interested and to purchase your ticket. Tickets can be bought up to the day of. Better get your ticket soon! Ben, it's too bad you can't bring the Three D boys. I think they would really enjoy it.

Well, I'm going to paint. I need to get some done so I can finish tomorrow. Actually I probably won't finish until Monday because I'm going to have to put a second coat on the cabinets that were just primed today. Ugh.

Hunting.... Ticks? Not This Time!

I feel wired. I had a coke and then some "feminine" coffee. I had no idea coffee could be categorized by gender but apparently it can be. Black is, according to my friend, manly, and coffee with tons of cream, sugar and whipped topping is feminine. *smiles* He is funny.

I hate words. I don't mind talking, but I often find it gets me in trouble so I'm going to strive to be quieter. It will do everyone a world of good.

Ben is right. I do like people. In fact, I like more people than I dislike. I just dislike a few so strongly that it makes me feel like I dislike everyone (which is not true).

I saw the “old man” again Friday. I was putting gas in the van and he was on the other side of the pump doing the same for his truck. My heart rate shot up, my hands started shaking and I couldn’t remember the pin number for the card and then the pump told me to go see the attendant. We made small talk about how I couldn’t get the card to work (I had walked inside the station at least twice by that time trying to get the pump to take the card). I don’t know what to think about that. Joe saw him… kinda. Man, I’m telling y’all, he is old.

I went out to eat with Carrie and Deb tonight. Goodness, I love them. They are so funny and so much fun to be around. I love working with Deb. She is laid-back and knows all the gossip about everyone who walks in the store. I know no one in this town and being the Curious George that I am it is quite enjoyable to hear all about these people. I love knowing facts about people who don’t know me.

The more I’m around or see country boys the more I want one. I don’t want some boy with the mindset that the city is all there is. Trust me, that will get nowhere with me. I love dirt roads, green grass, country music, driving just for the pure joy of driving, I even like gutting my own food! *laughs* That is a recent discovery. I am even more determined to go hunting this fall. I think I’m gonna ask Jonathan to take me. I don’t know who else to ask. It’s not like RG would take me. I don’t even know if he hunts. Besides it takes him like a year to do anything. And that is a fact because it took him over a year to take me to see his Dad’s house. I am very thankful for the moonlit tour, it was beautiful (the home and the moon), but I did ask him for a tour in the spring of 2008 and I just got my tour this past Wednesday. Jonathan would take me… I just don’t know if he would be able to concentrate on hunting…deer. That would be a problem. I just need to buy my own gun, get a license, purchase my own deer-stand and hunt on our property. But we have dogs that would not only follow me but they would also chase the deer and then I’d want to hunt dogs instead of deer. That would be a problem. Oh, but hey, if I went this route, I could live out there too! *grins* http://home.windstream.net/tomf42344/

I need to go to bed. I’m cooking my rattlesnake tomorrow. I am so excited! I can’t wait. I know it’s going to be good. Goodnight y’all.

A Very Dead Snake

I spent my afternoon gutting a 5ft rattlesnake. Joe played with it for a while and took some really good pictures. I am quite proud of myself actually. I now know that I can skin, gut and chop a snake.



I know you probably can't hear the sound in the video, but hopefully it will work.

Yes, I am woman. Hear me roar. :)

I'll let you know how it turns out when I cook it. Which will probably be Sunday for lunch.

Brownie Pancakes

It hit me tonight that I was being really selfish concerning my relationship with the Lord. I had gotten to the point that I wasn't sure if I even cared about my relationship with Father Love. Because what had He done for me? Nothing. I was only mad because I didn't have a guy. But I don't even want a guy (except for one reason and that isn't a good one).

So I broke down and cried. I do care about my relationship with my Lord and Savior. I'm tired of being selfish and prideful and lying to myself (He has done sooo much more for me than I deserve).

I hope this rebellious season is over. It's exhausting living for your own desires.

Dad asked me tonight if RG read my blog. Good night. I hope not. I don't think he does. But it would be interesting if he did.
He has a kitten hanging around his house. Which is really funny to me because he doesn't like cats. I was holding the kitten and he asked me what I was going to name it. I told him if I named it he would have to keep it... he didn't agree. But I said I would name it Robert. hahaha!! I thought that was really clever. But it turns out Robert is a girl so it's now Roberta. *grins*

That reminds me. I need to bathe Sheba. She is so nasty. She is white... well, she's suppose to be white, but she's a grayish/brown color.

I made brownie batter pancakes today. They were like flat, round brownies. The boys loved them. No, I didn't let them have syrup. They didn't need it. They were worried about getting in trouble for eating brownie pancakes though. I laughed at them! Ha! I've given them ice-cream for breakfast before. Surely brownie pancakes aren't any worse! And I cooked scrambled eggs to go with it. So they had something healthy. :)

I've been buying a Sunday paper every week. For the coupons. I have been saving quite a bit on groceries doing this. I need to cut out the coupons and organize them. But buying groceries is so much more rewarding when you save money doing it. Makes my heart happy.

Well, good night friends. I need some sleep. I'm getting up by at least 8am today because I need to paint. I slept until 11:40 this morning and the only reason I woke up was because the house phone rang and it was in my room. I could have thrown that phone to China it made me so mad. And then I was really surprised when I saw what time it was. Anyways... I do need to paint tomorrow and I need sleep before doing that. So good night.

The Glory of Deceit

When I have no new books and I rarely ever reread a book, I write. And I'm not talking about blogs. I mean, I write blogs. But I’m talking about writing fiction. I figure I have a good imagination and surely I can come up with a good story. I'm on my third page. I started this afternoon. I love reading. I love writing. And no, I won't share. :)
It is my dream to be able to write a story about my life under a different name of course. But to be able to express how I feel about some people and be paid for it would be amazing. Gossip sells and my life could be summed up as a soap opera so I have no doubts as to whether or not it would be published. I do have doubts about whether or not people would read it and figure out who is who. Then I would have a big mess... mainly because there are so many people I don't care for. I can think of several right now. All girls. What does that tell you? Oh well I've always liked the male gender better. They are less complicated when it comes to dealing with life. That doesn't make the male population any less confusing to be sure so don't get that mixed up.

My Mother was an amazing woman. Yes, I struggled with my relationship with her, but that doesn't change the fact that I admired, respected and adored her. I can't help but despise the fact that Sybol Allen is not known and will not be known to a certain someone. And no one cares. But I do and I hate it. I don't even want to look at, or speak to that person. There is no respect. And the lies that have made this event come about do nothing to encourage compassion within my heart. Not that I'm a very compassionate person as it is (I know this to be very true so don't even try to say otherwise), but this makes me want to harden my heart towards you. You don't deserve it.

I know what you are thinking at this point Dad. But please remember this is my blog, my opinions and all I ask is that you don't make decisions based on my feelings.

Anna seems to think I have a Mr. Darcy in my life. It's absurd. She thinks it's RG. I told her my life is not based on a book, or a movie. As I have told several people in the last couple weeks, I wouldn't date him if he was the last guy on earth. He's stuck up, self-centered, and has a fear of commitment. And I do laugh at him. He is far from perfect, girls and, it's high time someone of the female gender realized this fact. This is sounding a bit like Elizabeth's opinions of Mr. Darcy isn't it? Who cares? While we're talking about all the things I don't like about RG (you guys do know how much I adore him so just let me have my say and we'll be done with it). I don't like that he is only attracted to far too skinny blond-headed girls and he has a whole slew of girls that fit that description who are fans of his. It disgusts me. I promise I have a whole list in the back of my head of things I don't like about him, but right now that is the only thing I can remember and it's not even completely accurate because he wasn't attracted to the Bobbsey Twins (the actual Bobbsey twin characters were, by the way, male and female unlike the twins I'm talking about).
Anyways, RG is the one friend I can have a conversation with on the phone and it's not weird nor do I dread it. Of course that's probably only because we don't ever talk more than 10-15 minutes and those are the kinds of phone calls I like: short, sweet and to the point. But then we cover a large range of topics too. In person, I try not to talk to him too much. I'm too comfortable around him. I don't care what he thinks and that gets me in trouble (with myself) at times.
I keep trying to think of girls that I approve of to set him up with, but his biggest fault is being a pecan farmer in South GA. What girl is going to want to live here for the rest of her life? I don’t know of any.
Oh, the other big thing I don't like about him is that he doesn’t come to church consistently. I don't understand that. If I don't go to church it's because I don't want too and that isn't very often. But he goes off for what? It's always something valid. It irritates me.
And I don't understand why he didn't tell. Wait, I do know. He forgot. I felt like his secretary today making phone calls so people would know that we are going to watch a movie instead of having the Bible study. Perhaps I should have left it that way and it would have been a very awkward night with just the two of us. Ha! Not really, there is no being awkward with RG. I am rambling. And I have far too many paragraphs about him. Just pray he lets me drive his truck. That will be the highlight of my week! I love his truck (just between you and me that is the only reason I'm his friend).

Josh Bales. Yes, let's talk about another guy. The concert is happening. I had a ten minute conversation with Josh on Thursday. We are both super excited about it. He is going to call me a couple weeks ahead of time and set the date then. RG told me today that whatever day I chose is good for him. Isn't he sweet? *yes, that was a bit of sarcasm* Actually, I was very thankful for that. I mean, he is going to be right in the middle of harvest and that would be so confusing to go between him and Josh over and over to get a good day. Be expecting more details soon.

I need to go to bed. I'm feeling rather ill emotionally and mentally. Do you know what I have realized about myself? Several things actually. One, I'm an emotional drinker. I drink coke when I don't want to deal with life or whatever is being thrown my way. At least it's not beer right?! Second, I don't need a man. I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself. I only want a man for one reason and it isn't a good one. As Carrie told me the other day, "That's your problem!" We both started laughing. I realize it really is a problem. But I don't know how to fix it. I've never *needed* anyone or that's the lie I've told myself and I seem to be doing pretty well at this point, so I don't see a need to change. I guess deep down, I'm asking for prayer. I don't even know at this point.

Of course, if I was telling myself and you the truth it would read a bit more like this: I do need people. I need my family. I need friends. I need to be taken care of. But I hate feeling like I need something. I don't like dependent upon others. So it's easier to ignore these stupid feelings of needing.

But we aren't dealing with the truth. We are dealing with lies. And right now I like the lies better than I like the truth. Again, the lie that it hurts less to need less is sounding pretty good.

Good night friends.