a newbie to marriage

At the beginning of my marriage to Adam I realized how selfish I was: single, only having to look out for myself.
My wants. 
My needs. 
My money. 
My time. 
Mine. 
Mine.
Mine.

I've had to change my mindset to "us" with all of those things.

Today I realized how selfish I still am even after almost 6 months of marriage. Sure I've changed my basic thought process since getting married but I'm still consumed with me, myself and I.

I have put MY life as the focus of my life. I've forgotten, neglected, shamed my first Love. I've put my physical life before Christ. It wasn't hard for my own desires to give birth to sin as the Book of James warns.
Thankfully, I have a Savior Who loves me and desires LIFE more abundantly for me.

My struggles:
Change. I hate change. I've been working with the Lord to overcome this fear.

No family. No job. No friends....all huge changes.all very hard.
New town, new state, new people, new job, new church....all new.all different.all changes. 

Adam is constantly telling me to affect change where I can.

So I've been pursuing friendships. I have been making the first move. This is hard for me because I tend to be very shy at the beginning of a friendship.
But.I.Love.Coffee. And having coffee dates takes pressure off of me because I feel like if someone comes to my house it needs to be the perfect little American home. And I am far from perfect.

I pray that the Lord will continue to convict me as I strive to live for Christ. I also ask for prayer that I will keep Christ first. That I will put Adam above myself. I ask for prayer as I figure out how to enhance Adam's life and not turn it upside down because of changes I want (but don't always need).

I'm a newbie to marriage and need prayers.

Poll TIME!

If you are a married female and someone hosted a wedding shower for you, please do me a huge favor and complete my survey!

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I'd appreciate it soo much! Please also share with other married ladies you know!

I Am Married and Alive

I've been thinking about blogging for a while now but every time I sat down to write nothing would come out. But, finally, here I am.

I'm married and have not fallen off the face of the earth. I'm still alive. :) I've been married for 41 days. I LOVE being married. I love not being eight hours apart and waiting months on end to see Adam. I love being with him.

But it's been hard for me. I've cried. I've been angry. I've been lonely. I've moved to a town where I know no one and the women in the church my age have to desire to introduce themselves to me. I don't understand churches who don't feel a need to welcome a stranger.
I have one friend and I believe she needs my friendship as much as I need hers. God provides.
I miss my family so much. I've never lived away from home and now I find it probably would have been beneficial for me to have spent some time on my own. I don't for a second regret the decision I made to stay home I'm just saying that it would have helped with the transition.

I don't yet have a job and it's afforded me plenty of time to watch TV shows I've really never watched before (Millionaire Matchmaker, NCIS, The Newlywed Game, etc, etc). I've spent so much time rearranging the house and trying to straighten and clean and do laundry! I wash dishes about twice a week. I wash towels once a week. I iron Adam's dress clothes all week. I have a lot to do but it's not near as much fun without someone(s) to boss around!

I have started a few projects. Mostly with wedding pictures and dressing up the frames a bit. It's simple, cheap and takes a perfectly good frame to a piece of beautiful art!

All you need is fancy scrapbook paper, clear tape, and a picture frame! Just cut the paper to fit the matting and tape together. I actually taped my picture to the paper as well so it wouldn't fall when I hung it up. And you're done!

Look at how ORANGE his beard looks! I love it. I hope my kids have red, red hair! :)

"Oh, he's perfect... He's just not for me."

How many times have you heard that from a girl? I know I've said it before.

Almost every girl I know has that "perfect guy friend" but they would never consider him "marriage material".

But almost every girl I know (myself included) also complains about how there just aren't any guys within their social circle they would even consider.

My Dad has often said that as long as two people love the Lord and have Christ as their foundation for life they can make a marriage happen.

I think, we as women, fantasize marriage based on what our culture has told us it should be and we forget that marriage is work. It's hard work.

I loved this article for several reasons. One, she reminds us that the men who are kind, gentle and "there" are usually the best for a long-term relationship (which is what marriage should be: till death do you part). Two, in our society women are encouraged to have a job outside of the home or they are looked down upon for not achieving that level of success, but I know a lot of girls who are terrified that one day they won't have that white house with the picket fence and the 2.4 kids. She reminded me that sometimes looking for "Mr. Right" isn't always right.

Sounds like our "perfect guy friend" could be our "perfect marriage partner".

Just a thought....